We've entered the final 2 weeks before Baby Rodgers aka "Terry" arrives and although birth could now happen at pretty much any time, I'm still in that weird place between denial and excitement.
I've been asking myself a lot lately if what I am feeling is normal for a first-time dad and I can only assume that the answer is yes. I should be scared as it's a totally new experience and I will become 50% responsible for a brand new life and everything that goes along with that; shaping it, moulding it, nurturing it and loving it... Yeah, I've had cats my entire life, but this, this will be totally different and it scares the shit out of me!
I'm also having some feelings of excitement and wonder; what will he be like - will I like him? Will he like me? Will becoming a dad change my fears into absolute devotion and unconditional love for this new little person? I hope so.
The truth be told, I am a bloke, and being a bloke, there will always be that little niggling voice at the back of my head that says "you're not ready yet", but we have to ignore that now. You will actually never be ready for something this monumental, so beating yourself up mentally isn't going to help you, it'll simply make you nervous and fearful, rather than excited.
What am I afraid of though, really? Having no money, not getting enough sleep, breaking the baby, getting fat (or a Dadbod), bla bla bla! So in reality a lot of trivial stuff which can be overcome; money? I won't be going out as much, so maybe it's a good time to save! Sleep? Lots and lots of caffeine! Besides, I've done this before when we got The Mice (I'll explain another time) and they kept us up all night for several weeks with incessant yowling... Breaking the baby? They are more robust that we think, plus I have a spousal supervisor, plus I'm not a bloody idiot! Getting fat? Put that cookie down!!! Seriously though, you're going to witness me NOT getting fat in the coming months, so let's see how I get on.
What we need to be thinking about is that no-one knows our future children or what they're gonna be like, not even them! Our significant others - the mothers of our children - don't know either and although I am speaking to you right now, the reader, I am also speaking to my own inner-self and saying "fuck it, embrace it". We have zero control over this situation and we need to just let it happen and look forward to what comes on the other side. Yeah we may not get much sleep at the start and we may lose our weekend lie-ins and the ability to do whatever we want whenever we want, but we knew that anyway, before even getting this far... So stop dwelling on it. Move on. The baby is coming and you have the power to not let him/her be an asshole!
I am sure most of you, like me, will have an amazing partner who is in it with you and there to be that support network and family. We're building a family guys. A fucking family! And guess what, it won't be long now until you're referred to as "Dad". How cool will that be?